Female Friends

The pretty one, the sweet one, the sarcastic one, the hypochondriac, the "mysterious" one, the snooty one, the boring one, the loose one, the hippie, the mom, the "drinks to much" one, the perfectionist, the ghetto one, the musician, the gossiping one, the wealthy one, the judgmental one, the atheist, the writer, the country bumpkin, the churchy one, the actress, the tomboy, the "hard knocked life" one, the drama queen, the annoying one, the "always super happy" one, the moaner, the positive "cup is half full" one, the stoner, the B*$#*, the dancing queen, the fat one, the pathological liar, the angel, the grouch, the virgin, the nerd...as you can see this list is long and can be much longer.  We have all worn one or more of these hats in a friendship.  But one thing remains...they were your friend for a reason. 

We need friends.  We need interaction with other females that we share common interests with.  We need to laugh!  We need to cry!  Why is it that the friendships we need and desire in life are the hardest to keep?  Here is the answer---because they all need work and I would guess 65% of females refuse to do so.  "Friendships don't require work. Friendships should be easy."  Look back through your entire life.  How many friends have you had since grade school or middle school?  I'm betting that number is under 2.  The reason they work for so many years is a measure of give and take.  When you need me I am there, when I need you, you are here.  You know everything about each other (good bad and indifferent).   

I believe that this measurement changes as we age because we get get bitter, we get more opinionated, we feel like we deserve more...   But why?  What have you done for your current friend situation that makes you so noble?  Did you save her from a bullet?  Did you jump in front of that car for her?  Did you take the fall for her when she went to jail?  Those are pretty serious instances and I am sure that most of them never happened.  The reality of why your friendships end or slowly fade is that you probably are holding a grudge, that you are jealous, that you are bored, that you are annoyed, that you just plain and simple sick of their BS.  Three words for you GET OVER IT.  

Some friends are meant to let go of...but if you feel yourself missing them, yearning to know how they are, reminiscing on all the fun you shared together---what are you waiting for?  Call them!  Make a lunch date!  Send a card!  DO NOT rely on social networking and texting to reunite you.  Having friendships with women is crucial to your life and even your health believe it or not!   Friends will soothe you, friends will fill voids in your life, friends will fill "emotional gaps" in relationships.  If you are married with kids, having friends with children and spouses will help you relieve stress, can help reduce your blood pressure, can help you feel better when you are ill!   It's all about bonding, then venting, then letting go.  Friends can also help you remember who you are when life has eaten you alive. 

So who are you thinking of right now?  Do yourself a favor and get in touch with her.  Don't let something great slip between your fingers because you are too stubborn to step forward and make the first move.  Be the most awesome friend!  You will definitely regret those "bestie" photos 5 years from now when you despise one another if you don't repair the damage now.  Think about the reasons you aren't friends anymore...how serious was it really?  Don't let life and family get in the way of you maintaining friendships.  Your family is there forever-you could have a friend out there that is really needing you at this moment and you are too busy being busy.  Just be the type of friend you think you deserve.  Then it will come back to you.

Check out this video on the Female Friendship Formula!  
Takeaway Tips:
1. Make it a point to fit your friend in. 
2. Stop obsessing over the past.
3. Stop making excuses.
4. Don't let Facebook replace face time.


Thanks again for reading chickees and feel free to chime in or leave comments!  Muah!